Sunday, April 27, 2008 @ 12:42 PM

WHOOOOooo. Soo, I'm still alive. hahah. Had fun with Wendy yesterday rolling around the house and just slacking. Today's gonna be a superrrr busy day! I still feel like sleeping though. hahah. Shall blog about today tmr! lol.

I've done everything I could to explain myself, but to no avail
I give up trying
But I truly believe one day the truth will come to you
And you'll realise how wrong you are
Living in a lie and not having the least trust in me
Not now, but someday, you'll see the truth
That's my trust in you
Till then, wish you well
Even though I really loved you,
I'm gonna smile cus I deserve to.

Good love is on the way! :)

Saturday, April 26, 2008 @ 12:51 PM

Hide me now
Under your wings
Cover me
within your mighty hand

When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you above the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you are God

Find rest my soul
In Christ alone
Know his power
In quietness and trust

Wednesday, April 23, 2008 @ 9:55 PM

I know there'll be more to come.
I must brace it up.
I'm stronger than this.
What doesn't kills me makes me stronger.
I can do it.
I will get through this.

@ 3:25 PM

Insensitive?
Trying too hard to be sensitive?
It was so obvious.
Damn it :(

Monday, April 21, 2008 @ 7:46 PM

Read this on Karen's blog.

1) Never explain yourself to anyone, because the person who likes you doesn't need it, and the person who dislikes you wont believe it.

2) Dont make promises when you are in joy, dont reply when you are sad, dont make decisions when you are angry, think twice, act wise.

3) Dont let someone become a priority in your life, when you are just an option in theirs, relationships work best when they are balanced.

4) Time is like river, you cannot touch the same water twice, because the flow that has passed will never pass again.

These 4 quotes speaks so much to me. For now, especially the first one.

I can really understand it now. Its not so much of me explaining to others, but rather the other way round. I find myself not trusting whatever some people say anymore. I might not say anything about it, but it simply meant that I know I won't believe whatever he/she have to say even after I speak my mind. It really arghh me when people say an obvious lie to hide what they feel inside think that they hid their emotions well. It just hurts the other person when they find out the truth, no matter what nice reasons you might have for lying. Sometimes, the more you try to hide, the more truth shows. Liar. >:(

Baaa, I dislike how I'm like this. So distrustful and unforgiving. I don't know why I'm feeling this. Sian.

Ok, time to start doing some stuff. Tmr will be a much better day!

Sunday, April 20, 2008 @ 8:05 PM

Sooo my weekend was crazy. Its so tiring I'm starting to stone already. And I haven't open my schbag since Friday. Best.

Saturday

Woke up early for rugby match with Kahhwee. The match was soooo exciting my heart was like hanging there the whole time. We won RJC 3-0. The guys did well, but can be so much better though. The best is yet to be! But its good enough for now. Mr Ong was super funny the day. He was all agitated during the match shouting and screaming. Then at the end of the match he waved goodbye to the RJ ruggers like one small kid. hahah. And we couldn't even hear the RJ supporters during the match. The councilors and soccer boys were cheering so well, as usual. haha. They always make the match so much more exciting :):) Went over to IB after the match for awhile to check out the scores. Then went to Crystal Jade @ Holland V for lunch.

Walked around Holland with Kh thn went to The Cathay to eat sushi with my family. Was soo full after crystal jade. I only ate a few fried tofu and prawn sushi. Thats the only 2 things I will eat at any sushi place. haha. My Aunt and my cousin came to my hse to play mahjong after that. Played for so so so long till I finally decided that I don't wanna lose anymore money. I lost ALL THE WAY. Really ALL THE WAY. Really got something wrong. I've never lost so many times in a row before. SIANNN. Maybe I wasn't concentrated enough.

Left house to meet Bernice Huiting Jennifer Pam Calvin Jerermy John at Clarke Quay after that. Settled at Indochine after walking for super super long cus it was packed everywhere. Played some drinking games thn Bernice got pretty high. hahah. It was super funny. Calvin was super blur too. hahah. I got drowsy after drinking for abit but Huiting's scream when she lost the game totally woke me up -.- I can still vaguely hear it now. hahah. We almost finished the bottle. Thn I wanted to leave early cus I drank on an empty stomach and I was feeling super nauseous already. They wanted to go MOS after that but didn't go bcus of me. :(:( So sorry girls! Cabbed home after that and vomitted quite badly. Blaa. All the sushi gone. Immediately bathed and crashed after that. I was sooo sooo soo soooo sooooo tired by thn already.

Sunday

Woke up early feeling super energetic and with no hangover :):) Its funny how I'll always wake up feeling exceptionally awake after drinking the previous night. Like during the China trip! Audrey was the one who always have to drag me out of bed but I dragged her out of bed instead after the night at Carey&Karen's room. Went for lunch with my relatives thn went to cemetery after that. It was so tiringggg. We had to go to 5 places they were near but not so near to each other so we have to keep getting on and off the car. But it was really nice hearing them talk about the good old times and I always learn something new about my family after these.

I thought of alottttt of things at the cemetery. I felt really really upset visiting my Grandfather's grave, considering he only passed away last year. It just feels, weird. Cus usually he'll be with us. Now we're visiting him. And what got me thinking more was my Aunt. Its really saddening to see my others aunts still crying over the death of my Aunt even 22 years after her death. I asked my Dad about her death after so many years and I heard the most shocking thing ever. It was so sudden, and its not worth it at all, not at all. I finally understood why they were so sad even after 22 years. Time doesn't heal all wounds.

Just got home after dinner with them. Haven't touch my weekend assignments at all. Haven't iron my uniform. But I'm so tired already. Both mentally and physically. I feel so drained. My heart still aches so badly. :(:( Hopefully chapel tmr will help.

Saturday, April 19, 2008 @ 7:44 PM

There was a girl who looked into the eyes of the love of her life and told
him "Actually, I think I dont love you anymore." She figured that it'll make him feel better. Its still the most hurtful and regretful thing she has ever heard herself said.

After everything, she changed, he changed. He have his new life, she have hers too. Memories of him faded. He wasn't anyone she used to know anymore. They've drifted so far away from the past. Everybody loves him, and she's the last thing on his mind.

But when she looked into his eyes, she felt the same. The love she had hasn't change. It was like falling in love with a stranger and she doesn't know why.

She know that things won't go back to anywhere near the past, but she tried to be around anyway, in case he needs her while trying to forget him. She said all the wrong things when it comes to him. And she's so tired out now, by her own stubbornness.

But she's still gonna try anyway, try her very best to get on with her life.

How long does it take to forget a person? I guess a lifetime's still too short for her.

You can do whatever makes you happy, as for me, I'll still be loving you. :)

Thursday, April 17, 2008 @ 10:40 PM

Hellllooooooo. I'm bloggingggggg nowww. But I'm so lazy to write what happened alredy. hahh. So anw, today wasn't a good day. I had so so soo much things going in my mind today, yesterday, yesterday's yesterday etc plus I was so tired from studying at bm I almost died in school today. I was slightlyyyy quiet in sch today, for once.

Bahh, I can't do it anymore, its soooo hard now and its not getting any easier. I don't know whats wrong with me :(:( I dreaddd going to school. I don't wanna go for classes, I don't wanna for lectures! Bwaa I'm so lousy.

I miss Jesica alot alot now :(:( It would've been so much easier for me to get through if she's still in Singapore. COME BACK NOW!

Hey there Delilah,
What’s it like in New York City?
I’m a thousand miles away,
But girl tonight you look so pretty,
Yes you do,
Time Square can’t shine as bright as you,
I swear it’s true.

Hey there Delilah,
Don’t you worry about the distance,
I’m right there if you get lonely,
Give this song another listen,
Close your eyes,
Listen to my voice it’s my disguise,
I’m by your side.

Oh it’s what you do to me,
Oh it’s what you do to me,
Oh it’s what you do to me,
Oh it’s what you do to me,
What you do to me.

Hey there Delilah,
I know times are getting hard,
But just believe me girl some day,
I'll pay the bills with this guitar,
We'll have it good,
We'll have the life we knew we would,
My word is good.

Hey there Delilah,
I’ve got so much left to say,
If every simple song I wrote to you,
Would take your breath away,
I’d write it all,
Even more in love with me you’d fall,
We’d have it all.

A thousand miles seems pretty far,
But they’ve got planes and trains and cars,
I’d walk to you if I had no other way,
Our friends would all make fun of us,
And we'll just laugh along because,
We know that none of them have felt this way,
Delilah I can promise you,
That by the time that we get through,
The world will never ever be the same,
And you’re to blame.

Hey there Delilah you be good,
And don’t you miss me,
Two more years and you’ll be done with school,
And I'll be making history,
Like I do,
You’ll know it's all because of you,
We can do whatever we want to,
Hey there Delilah here's to you,
This one’s for you.

:(:( SLEEEPING time friends! Goodnight.

Monday, April 14, 2008 @ 9:43 PM

Haven't been blogging for a week! hahah. Time passes sooo quickly I didn't even realise. I was just too lazy to blog and soo many things happen everyday I find myself forgetting most of them when I'm not lazy to blog abt them anymore. hahah.

So today was a normal dayy, lessons were pretty slack. Especially during Chem! The teacher is sooooooooo -.- hahah. But he was quite funny. So after sch went to study at the Sports Complex with Monster. Didn't do much cus we were moving and moving and moving bcus of the stupid weather. And Jeco. hahah. I feel like some nomads. At first we were studying at the usual place, but we decided the weather was starting to kill us so we went up to the cafe and Jeco was there too. Studied for awhile at the cafe then Jeco went to change and he told us he was going to run 100m so we packed our stuff and wanted to go to the bleachers to see him run. But the truth is he got changed for training and not for track meets. NICEE. But Monster decided that she couldn't study anymore so we went back down to the usual place to watch the track meets. With Jeco running up and down the badminton hall for don't know how many times just so that he won't miss his idol's race bcus of his training. hahah. It rained super heavily after a few events thn we decided to go homeeeee. It was so heavy we decided to wait at the bleachers but we got wet even at the bleachers so we went to the void deck. We couldn't go home bcus of my stubbornness. Sorryy :(:( Saw Huiting and Mabel when we were buying food in the canteen and Mabel asked her Dad to send us to our busstops! hahah. Thanksss :):)

I'm a happy person today cus my Mum cooked dinner! hahah. I ate alot alot alot. Though I ate alot in school already. haha. But its never enough!

Short schday tmr! hahah. Studying with Monster after sch again tmr :):) Should be much more productive than today!

If I don’t need you then why am I crying on my bed?
If I don’t need you then why does your name resound in my head?
If you’re not for me then why does this distance maim my life?
If you’re not for me then why do I dream of you?

‘Cause I miss you, body and soul so strong that it takes my breath away
And I breathe you into my heart and pray for the strength to stand today
‘Cause I love you, whether it’s wrong or right
And though I can’t be with you tonight
You know my heart is with you

I don’t know why you’re so far away
But I know that this much is true
I hope I love you all my life

Tuesday, April 08, 2008 @ 7:51 PM

TODAYYYYYYYYY is a no money day! hahah. Forgot to get pocket money from my parents so I was living on coins and Joan today. haha. Stupid bus broke down today. Walked 2 busstops to get to school. Superrrr tiring. My reward is a complimentary ticket! hahah. I was so excited about it so I showed it to the girls during assembly BUT none of them seemed to be interested in it :(:(

Lessons were ok today. hahah. Time just flew by. Before I knew it, school ended alr! hahah. Lunched in school. Andddd Mingxia looks special today. hahah. I'm still trying to figure out why. Went over to Sports Complex to study with Joan before her dance. Mingxia joined us for awhile. It was super fun making fun of him. hahha. Saw Mr Lau there too. I told him to look at my penguin water dispenser and told him thats a mirror! haha. I really really think he looks like the penguin.

Waited for Weiting then we went home together and I was complaining to him about all the small little things about the school like usual. E.g Locker stuff. hahah. RACHEL, I DID MY PART. haha. All our bags were stacked on my lap bcus I was sitting and he was standing beside. And bcus both of our bags are so big, plus the penguin dispenser. It piled up so high I almost couldn't see and I couldn't move at all. The bus was like packed with human beings and the bus driver didn't want to drive till people move all the way to the back. Brrr. One disastrous bus ride home, though I had a seat. hahah.

OH YEA. I ate 1 muffin today. hahah. Pam ate 1, Monster ate 1, Rachel ate 1. Niceeee. hahah. Oh and I just finished half a Spring Chicken by myself! hahha. And my throat feels weird now. lol.

I knew a girl who's broken hearted
Over a boy who could not share his feelings
She really loved him
And I know a boy who could not say just
Three little words that would make her day
It hurt her
Though he really loved her

If there's a lesson to be learned it's a hard one to take
Once it falls apart it's so hard to unbreak
So don't you ever make that mistake

Tell her that you love her
Tell her that you need her
She may never know unless you
Show her what your feeling
Tell her you're believing
Even though it's hard to say
Don't turn away
Don't be afraid

She's a real nice girl
And she's always there for you
But a nice girl wouldn't tell you what you should do

Tell her about it
Tell her everything you feel
Give her every reason to accept
That you're for real
Tell her about it
Tell her all your crazy dreams
Let her know you need her
Let her know how much she means
Tell her about it
Let her know how much you care
When she can't be with you
Tell her you wish you were there

'Cause now and then
She'll get to worrying
Just because you haven't spoken
For so long
Though you may not have done anything
Will that be a consolation when she's gone

She's a trusting soul
She's put her trust in you
But a girl like that won't tell you
What you should do

Tell her about it
Before it gets too late
You got to tell her about it
Don't turn away
Don't be afraid

Monday, April 07, 2008 @ 11:08 PM

Sunday, April 06, 2008 @ 11:09 PM

Decided to blog before I sleeeeep tonightt. hhaha. Woke up at like 8am this morning to eat Dim sum with my family! Ate soooo sooo soo much I was just stoning after eating while the rest of them were talking. Usually, after dim sum we will usually go home. But todayyy, my auntie randomly talked abt mahjong and everyone got so excited about it so went decided to go to her house to play mahjong! hahah. Sunday family bondinggg. :):)

On our way to her house, my uncle drove us to an animal farm in some ulu place. There were all the small animals there, and 2 super huge goat. Ok maybe goats are supposed to be that big but this is the first time I see it right infront of me. Super scary. So we went there to feed the goats, rabbits, birds, fishes etc etc. It was super hot there I almost melted on the spot. hahah. But everything there seems cute to me. haha. So I didn't really complain when I was there, miraculously.

So we played for a few hours. And I won the most money! hahah. I basically won the 3 of them. HOHOOOhooo. Okay, but thats not the point. Main point is family bondingggg. hahah. It was really fun during the game. :):)

Got home and stoned for alot. hahah. Actually I've been stoning alot the past few days. Been thinking alot, but pretty much about the same thing. Which is annoying me very much. TO BE OR NOT TO BE? HOWWWWW. OH WELLSSSSS, A LVLS FIRSTTT. AHHHHH. :(:(

Speaking about A lvls, I haven't been studying. And I haven't done any work for the weekend. SO, its 11.30 nowww and I shall go sleep, and start doing my work....tmr! Yes, settled. hahah. Goodnight!

Friday, April 04, 2008 @ 11:51 PM

YOOO WASSSUP! Hahah. First thing first, I ate 1 muffin today. Sooo school today was good. I kinda forgot what happened alr. hahah. But there were funny stuffs here and there. Went to cafe to study with Monster before the Swim Meets. Then moved down bcus the cafe was too noisy. And we met Shahir there! haha. Monster SOS my Complex Numbers for awhile thn I went to Swim Meets to do CIP with Bernice. It was super super slack. I almost fell asleep while doing the CIP. hhaha. Oh and I really loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Monster soooo sooo soo much for tolerating all my senseless talk and still decided to accompany me. hahaha. She's the best! :):)

Went to meet Dumbass at Lido after CIP. Saw the ruggers there too. hahah. Wanted to watch a movie but the movie timing were all weirdddd times. Went to Far east plaza to check out the salons but didn't cut my hair in the end cus I also dont know why. hahah. Then went to Cineleisure but the tickets were sold out alr :(:( Went to eat at Kobayashi and then walked to Borders. My legs are aching nowwwww.

Ok actually there was something super funny which happened today which I wanted to blog abt but I can't remember what it is now. I think I'll blog when I remember, if i ever remember. hahah.

ANDDDD, I'VE BEEN LISTENING TO JASON MRAZ - I'M YOURS FOR THE WHOLEEEE OF DAY. More than 10 times alr! hahah. Tessa says that she can guess that I'm listening to this song from the way I nod my head whnever I listen to this song. hahaa. It soo super duper nice and sweeeeeeeeet and it makes people happpyyy! :):)

Well open up your mind and see like me
open up your plans and damn you're free
look into your heart and you'll find love love love
listen to the music at the moment maybe sing with me
Ah, la peaceful melody
It's your god forsaken right to be loved loved loved loved loved

So, I won't hesitate no more,
no more, it cannot wait I'm sure
there's no need to complicate our time is short
this is our fate, I'm yours

no please don't complicate, our time is short
this is our fate, I'm yours.
no please don't hesitate no more, no more
it cannot wait, the sky is yours!

Thursday, April 03, 2008 @ 11:47 PM

School didn't start well today but it got better and better as the day goes on. School makes me happpyyy :) Its always so fun and full of unexpected happeningss that will make me laugh really hard. But I really want to get out of this place and start a new life all over again, though I know I'll really miss all the fun. BUT before that, have to get through A lvls first. SIANED.

FOOOOOOOOD TALK! I ate like 4 muffins and 2 swiss rolls in total these 2 days. hahah. And I'm going to eat more tmr! Muffins how niceeee! :) Today was a crazy day, I ate nonstopppp!

1)Muffin no.1
2)Noodlesss
3)Muffin no.2 + Swiss roll + Ribena
4)Fries
5)Dinnerr!
6)Fried chickennnnnnn

Actually not as much as I thought. hahah. But i still feel very full now.

Ok, 我好累啊我要睡觉了，晚安！

One day your story will be told
One of the lucky ones whos made his name
One day they'll make you glorious
Beneath the lights of your deserved fame

And it all comes 'round once in a lifetime
like it always does.
Everybody loves you 'cause you've taken a chance
out on a dance to the moon
And they'll say told you so, we were the ones who saw you first of all
we always knew that you were one of the brightest stars

Wednesday, April 02, 2008 @ 10:14 PM

So so so so soooo tired now. X_X So anyway, watched the worst video of my life today during GP lesson today. It was so gross I almost died watching it. Super uncomfortable and annoyed by it! Grr. Nice 'Honour Killing' all -.-

Went for Entree then went to watch rugby match! Roy came over to "support his friends", more like checking out opponents. hahah. ACJC won PJC 78-0 and Timothy scored 2 tries! How pro is that :) hahha. OH, and Ming Xia's the referee for the match! hahha. Coool. His reward for being a referee is a new whistle which he is very very proud of bcus its very loud. -.- hahah. Accompanied Tessa to wait for Same Same thn went off with Roy. It was so funny in the bus cus we couldn't decide where to sit and we kept changing and changing places. hahah. Went to meet Dumbass for dinner after that. I was soooo tired I was even stoning when I was eating. Didn't really eat much cus I wasn't really very hungry after eating so many muffins today. hahah.

OKAYY im done here. Im soo happyyyyyy now! :) You deserved that :)

QUOTE OF THE DAY: "I'll think about it and tell you yesterday"

Tuesday, April 01, 2008 @ 9:50 PM

Dumbass just asked me to blog so I'm being very nice here. haha. So many things happened past few days and I was sooooo tired. So i got lazy to blog alr.

Andd, IM SO BORED ONLINE NOW, WHERE IS EVERYONEEEEE!

Rugby seasons starts tmr! Finally a match to watch in sch. haha. But there's probably swim meets thing tmr. SIANEDDD.

Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings
You didn't notice, you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning, to love again
All I know is, I'm going to be ok

Since theres no more you and me
Its time I let you go so I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is ill be fine without you
Yes I will

Thought I couldn't live without you
Its gonna hurt when it heals to
It'll all get better in time
Even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

hurr yi xuan
260890
hps gesps gess acjc nus biz

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